I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I just pynch a tree in the face
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
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