I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize