YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
You need a sexual gate keeper
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize