i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Bring me that man meat
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Randomize