we're blogging at a bar
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
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I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
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4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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