Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
