Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
MIDGETS
????
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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