Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
He? As in you personified your dick?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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