Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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