A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize