this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
someone owes me an orgasm
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize