I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
