ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize
