This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
