dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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