Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
40s are totally the cure
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
