I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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