Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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