Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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