Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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