do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize