Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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