even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
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