I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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