he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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