We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
