I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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