At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Randomize
