I bet he comes in French.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I will pee on everything he values.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
