i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
