My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
