I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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