you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
it glows. i had to have it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
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