Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
