Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
