are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
