Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09