ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Ladies don't puke and tell
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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