I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It's never too late to be topless.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize