Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
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