Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
