Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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