Got a toothbrush?
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize