ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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