Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Randomize