i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize