My nipple is on Facebook.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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