I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.