Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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