His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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