ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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