I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
