in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I've blown a few things in my day
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
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and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
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You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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